Its owanbe Saturday again and today, we bring you funny things that happen at Nigerian weddings that you and I can relate to. Nigerians are full of drama, we are entertaining, and so are our events.
The bride is always late
Nigerian brides have a penchant for coming late to their own weddings!!! Aint no bride who loves late coming like a Nigerian bride, or how else do we know they are the stars of their own show? nothing beats an African time like a Nigerian bride arriving late at the church and rushing in, except the church is super strict with its timing. Phewwwwww!!!
The wedding sermon is usually long
Ever attended a Nigerian wedding church service? jeez!!! it’s like the pastors/reverend fathers had a meeting to always prolong that service and they do a good work of making it so, and it’s like those people just try to show off with their preachings. C’mon be fast, there is party rice awaiting my presence!!!
Guests never show up for the church service
It is a Nigerian thing not to show up at the church service of a wedding. Most times you see 12 guests at the church service and 2000 at the reception hall, everybody has gone to pick a suitable seat there.
The reception never starts on time
This is so Nigerian weddings. It’s like there is a memo at every Nigerian wedding reception; never start on time. Ever heard of the phrase, “African time?” it started from Nigeria. The bride always has to go and freshen up, thus leaving her guests at the mercy of the Master of the ceremony, popularly known as MC.
There are varieties of souvenirs that never reach every guest
This one is a must at Yoruba weddings especially, there are so many souvenirs from all the aunties and uncles of the couples, but not every guest gets one. You must know the great grand uncle’s friend’s sister’s sister’s mother’s sibling before you are eligible for a souvenir, else, na only you waka come o. There are garri, detergents, palm oil, orishirishi things to be shared by those they know to those they know. It’s in the Nigerian wedding constitution.
No asoebi, no souvenir
Let me warn you in advance if you know you didn’t buy the wedding aso ebi, I will advise you not to go for that wedding unless you don’t mind not getting aso ebi. If you choose to be headstrong about my advice and go, anything you see, take it like that. I rest my case.
It is in the constitution of Nigerian weddings that the food must never go round
My people, eat at home, to avoid stories that touch. It is in some invisible constitution of Nigerian weddings to serve only a selected few at these weddings. Some people eat twice, thrice, while others do not even taste the food to check if there is Maggi. Sorry ma, but the food is never enough.
Single ladies must catch the flower before the wedding ends
A Nigerian wedding is not complete except the song, “Single ladies” is played by the DJ and the bride throws her boutique for one of her friends or guests to catch, so they can all begin to plan hers.